February 3, 2014

three: silence

(photo from weheartit)

day three of the blog #blogeverydayinFEB challenge (from the anchored in love blog) is a little more difficult to write. nobody really likes talking about what scares them the most, but here it goes.

these last couple of days i have been in the book of exodus in my time with the Lord. i've been reading about how God redeemed moses and how His hand was in every aspect of his life. this particular weekend i was reading exodus chapter fourteen, in this part of the story moses tells his people something incredible amongst their complaining.

"don't be afraid. stand up and look! the Lord, He will work out your rescue, you just watch. He will fight the battle for you, and he always wins. you don't have to say a word." v. 13-14. (super loose translation but its in plain english. i like those.)

so in a nutshell that is my worst fear. complaining and fear itself sets me apart from God all the time. i feel for moses' people because im sure in their hearts they weren't just complaining, they were scared out of their minds! my prayers are often clouded with a million other things i'm thinking and it's hard for me to really be still and listen. i hate listening! and when i'm scared or worried about something it clouds my alone time even more. i'm more comfortable to sit and complain to God about what i think i need and want. it's hard to be silent and alone with God...who knows what He's going to tell you! it seems idiotic but maybe i'm truly afraid of what would happen if i let God fight my battle for me. to not have to say a word, to be still and not be afraid of something sounds impossible to me. i fear that my quiet times with Him can sometimes be mundane and just another "check" off my "spiritual check list" that makes me feel good about myself. fear is not of Him and i'm well aware of that but this is where redemption work is done. right here, sitting in my fear (any one's fear) and helplessness. i don't know what's going to happen next in my life (and neither did the israelites) but i'm working on letting God fight the battles for me and well, just be silent

"the Lord will fight for you, and you only have to be silent." v.14


9 comments:

  1. This is really beautiful! That's a great verse, and I love that you're cultivating silence instead of fear. My flat-mate and I are going on a silent Jesus retreat this weekend, and I'm so looking forward to just waiting on and listening to the Lord.
    Have you heard of Ann Voskamp's "One Thousand Gifts"? It's amazing, and she talks about choosing gratefulness for each moment. I think you may enjoy it.

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    1. Ahhh! I've always wanted to try one of those silent retreats, I can't imagine what that would be like.
      Yes I have heard of that book but have never gotten around to purchasing it. I do read her blog from time to time. Are you and your friend doing that retreat through your church or individually?

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  2. loving your blog, girlfriend! just followed you :)
    can't wait to come back!

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    1. Oh my gosh, I don't get new followers often so this has made my day! Thank you for your sweet words love.

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  3. I completely understand where you're coming from! Verse 14 has been the background on my phone for the last month. I keep trying to remind myself that whenever I'm full of fear and worry, that he has it all in control and I just need to trust in Him. Great post!

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    1. Oh! How did you get a verse for your phone background? I want one!

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  4. Beautifully written, sister. It is so very, very hard for me to fully hand over my life, hand over my troubles and my worries and anxieties. I honestly don't know why I can't, but I all too often try to handle my own problems, live my own life, because I think I, too, get scared about what could happen if I give it all to Him. Trust is hard.

    But I love what you said about really trying to be focus, be still, and be dependent. That's something I really needed to remind myself of tonight! :)

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    1. thank you for your beautiful comment kiki. i feel so blessed to have met so many sisters in Christ lately. your words are much appreciated. xx

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  5. Thanks so much for sharing, dear! Naming the fear and setting it at the feet of Jesus is such a powerful thing!

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